Bucket lists are usually filled with adrenaline-pumping and heart-racing items like “go skydiving”, “ride an elephant” and “try dog sledding”.
But why not increase your bucket list with a few X rated activities (uh, sexactivities) like “bop in an anal plug” or “ride a suction cup dildo”.
Better yet, why not make a whole ass sex toy bucket list – sex educators recommend it.
We believe that pleasure is a fundamental aspect of a safe and healthy sex life. That’s why we rely on writers, educators, and other seasoned experts to share their suggestions on everything from the technique you use to the sex toy you buy.
We only recommend something we really like, so if you see a store link to a specific product or brand, know that it’s been thoroughly researched – if you know what we mean. Wink.
Sex toy-specific bucket lists offer many of the same benefits as G-rated bucket lists: they’re fun and engaging, plus they help you feel accomplished, push you out of your comfort zone, and encourage you to prioritize them. things you want to do.
They also have the added benefit of encouraging you to shop with sex toys.
“Just looking for the ‘right one’ that has all the bells and whistles YOU want equates to nirvana,” says erotic educator Taylor Sparks, founder of Organic love, one of the largest online privacy shops owned by BIPOC.
Andy Duran, gay sex educator and education director for a pleasure products company Good vibes, adds that sex toy bucket lists can help you get out of a sexual rut. And they can infuse your fun trip with a sense of novelty, adventure and spice.
Without a doubt, writing and working on a sex toy bucket list is a partner project.
But sex therapist Marla Renee Stewart, MA, brand expert and adult wellness retailer Lovers, recommend making one just for you too.
Developing one of these lists is a useful exercise in self-reflection, she says. “Having a list like this also encourages you to take the time to focus on yourself, check off the items on the list, and in doing so, learn what appeals to you. “
Because sex toys come at a cost to them, Sparks adds that making a list like this is also a reminder to yourself that you deserve to invest in your pleasure. * Fans face dollar bills *
“In long-term relationships, especially, it’s easy to fall into sexual habits with your partner,” says Duran.
For example, the same person always initiates at the same time of day, and then the sex proceeds the same each time. (Seems familiar?)
“Lists encourage you to step out of your way and rediscover yourself,” he says.
His recommendation: Make an appointment to make the list together. “Making a list with your sweetheart can be a really fun and intimate experience.”
To present the idea to your partner, you could say something like:
- “Baby, I have some kind of date idea that I want to try… make a bucket list of sex toys.” What do you think?”
- Consider this as your formal invitation to a sex toy bucket list with me on Saturday at 7:00 p.m. Please answer ‘Y’ for yes, ‘N’ for it doesn’t appeal to me, or ‘R’ for I like the idea. but I have to do it another night.
- “I just read an article on sex toy bucket lists, and thought it would be fun to make one set. Can I send you the link and if you are interested you can tell me which night works best? “
The best way to start figuring out which pleasure products to add to the list is to think about the types of sensations you already enjoy.
Then pair it with a sex toy that delivers that feel, but better, faster, harder, more consistently, or hands-free.
If you like anal fullness add a butt plug
Do you enjoy multi finger anal fingering, anal fisting, or anal sex with penetration with a dildo or penis? If so, you can enjoy the sustained anal fullness provided by a butt plug, which is designed to go into your peach and stay put.
“There are vibrating and non-vibrating anal plugs,” says Sparks. “With all the nerve endings in the anus and anal opening, why not add both types to your to-do list? ”
If you like oral sex add a penis or clit pump
“The pumps mimic the feeling of sucking on your genitals that usually occurs during oral sex as a couple,” says Duran.
These types of toys attract additional blood flow to the genitals, which allows people to experience engorgement for a short time.
And, because the increased blood flow is a component of arousal itself, Duran says these can promote arousal early in the game as well.
If you enjoy intense sucking while receiving oral intake, want to have fuller genitals, or have low arousal, add “try it.” Doc Johnson Bloom Intimate Vibrating Body Pump“(or the CalExotics Optimum Series Advanced Auto-Start Pump or Classic Shots Penis Pump) to your list.
Or… another option is to pair an air suction toy with lubricant
Also known as oral sex stimulators, air suction toys are designed to mimic an oral sensation, Sparks explains. But, since toys aren’t wet like mouths are, she recommends pairing them with a lubricant to better recreate the feel.
Oh, and you also want to take a look at the nozzle size to make sure your clit or the head of your cock will fit. (Some nozzles are smaller than others.)
If you like nipple stimulation, try a nipple toy
No matter what type of nipple stimulation you enjoy, there is a nipple toy for your list.
Do you like to have your nipples kissed? Add an air suction toy, such as the We-Vibe fondant.
Do you like getting your nipples sucked? Add a set of suction cups, such as the Kinklab bound to please nipple suckers.
Do you like to get biting or pinching your nipples? Add a set of nipple clamps, such as the Sexual Kitten Feather Nipple Clamps.
If you like to be handled by hand, try a toy
Do you like to play with your clitoris? Or feel a hand move up and down your cock? Add a stroker to the list.
Also known as masturbation sleeves, strokes are designed to encapsulate the external genitals and move side to side and up and down to mimic the feel of oral, anal, or vaginal sex.
“Think about what sexual fantasies you have that you really want to try,” suggests Stewart. “As you do this, think about the various accessories you would need to complete the sex experience. “
“If your fantasy is to squirt, for example, you can easily translate it by adding at least four new products to put on your bucket list,” she says.
This may include:
Likewise, if you have the fantasy of exploring double penetration, you might want to get:
A bucket list wouldn’t be a bucket list without some ~ extra ~ items. That’s where those spicy list prompts come in.
Save for a sex machine
“A sex machine isn’t something you can put away in your bedside drawer and hide under your bed,” says Duran. (They are a bit bigger than a microwave.)
“Buying something like this is a commitment… but for people who like penetration or vibration, it may be worth it,” he says.
Equipped with large motors, these pedal vibrators provide a really pleasant feeling for power seekers.
Furnish your weird space with sex furniture and positioning props
“People expect bed pillows, which are only meant to support the weight of your head, to support their bodies during sex,” says Sparks. “But these will continue to crumble, no matter how many you accumulate.”
This is where sex furniture comes in.
Whether there are several sex toys out of your budget, saving for one of these aforementioned luxury items, or just wanting to get your money’s worth, consider using a sex toy in several different ways.
You can, for example, use an anal plug as a vaginal plug, or use a stainless steel wand on the outside and inside.
It’s OK! “A sex toy bucket list should work like a sample tray in a restaurant,” says Duran.
In other words, you’ll likely like some of the things you try, hate other things, and be indifferent to the rest.
“What’s more important than enjoying the specific sex toy you’re trying out is enjoying the experience of trying new things and learning more about you and your partner’s tastes,” says -he.
Gabrielle Kassel is a New York-based Sex and Wellness writer and Level 1 CrossFit trainer. She became a morning person, tested over 200 vibrators, and ate, drank, and brushed with charcoal. – all in the name of journalism. In her spare time, she can be found reading self-help books and romance novels, bench press or pole dancing. Follow her on Instagram.